Pride: Coming out at work

Pride isn’t just a celebration of how far we’ve come – it’s a commitment to where we’re going. Creating a workplace where everyone feels safe to be themselves, is vital, and means our people can be at their best, every day of the year. Thanks to James Coulson, for sharing his story on coming out at work.

Pride isn’t just a celebration of how far we’ve come – it’s a commitment to where we’re going. Creating a workplace where everyone feels safe to be themselves, is vital, and means our people can be at their best, every day of the year. Thanks to James Coulson, for sharing his story on coming out at work.

“Writing this article is intimidating. I am essentially coming out to all my colleagues across the business who read it.”

I'm James, and I joined Rolls-Royce on the Engineering & Technology graduate programme after completing a degree in Mechanical Engineering at Northumbria University. I wanted to share my experiences of what it's like coming out as a young gay man early in his career.

I have always found defining 'coming out' as difficult. Is it by just suggesting you're gay, or by subtly mentioning you have a same sex partner or is it by actually saying "I'm gay"? I find saying the words is relatively easy – the hard part is the fear in the build-up to saying it and the fear of how people will view and treat you afterwards. Will people still see me for the person I am, the young engineer wanting to build pioneering products? Or will I be given a label, will I become the next topic of workplace gossip, might some of those people around me not accept my sexuality and treat me differently?

These are just some of the fears I've had when coming out at work. It is never something I do lightly, and it can take time for me to build trust with those around me; to try and understand and appreciate how they may react. Coming out is intimidating, regardless of the industry, but I found it harder in engineering than in other industries in which I have worked due to my own misconceptions and fears. I'm pleased that Rolls-Royce has been a very inclusive and welcoming place for me to work, and this inclusive culture has enabled me to feel comfortable enough to share my experiences, but that doesn't make coming out easier when you're still relatively new to the business and nervous about how people may react.

Despite what people think, coming out isn't a one-off activity, something you do once and never have to think of again. It is something LGBTQ+ people do almost every day depending on the situations they are presented with, who they are meeting and how comfortable they feel. It can be all too easy at times to skirt around the topic and it is something I have done myself. Do I come out? How do I come out? What's the professional way to come out? How will people react? Will they treat me the same? These are just some of the questions I have in the back of my mind every time a situation arises where I'm meeting new people. Sadly, we still live in a world where homophobia exists, albeit at times where it can be very hidden in the workplace.

As a graduate, I move around the company to new departments every two-five months, and with each move the stress returns of how do I tell my colleagues I am gay and how will they receive it? I assume this is something I will finesse throughout my career, and it is definitely easier now than it was for me when I started my first proper job. I hope one day it will be something I don't even consider and that it becomes easier for all those in the LGBTQ+ community as society becomes more open and accepting. But I also accept it is important to be visible to help us progress as a community and encourage a more open world.

One way I was determined to be visible was to get involved in Prism, our LGBTQ+ employee network in the UK. Prism is important to me as it facilitates and raises awareness of LGBTQ+ issues, some of which affect me personally and others that are important to the business. I was really impressed with Prism when I was here as an intern, and I was determined to get more involved as soon as I knew I'd be returning to Rolls-Royce. As a young gay man, I want to help make a difference and promote the positive impact of our work, and now I can do that by supporting our graduates and interns through my role on the Prism committee.

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